Recently, I've found myself being quiet more often. Of course, I don't ignore people when they are talking to me but I don't initiate conversation much any more. I find myself avoiding verbalization, actually. I know that sounds strange at first but there's a reason. I prefer gathering information over divulging these days so, even if I can contribute, I refrain from interjecting (because the satisfaction of discovering the thoughts of others makes my silence worthwhile). When I do speak, I try to speak with purpose. As a matter of fact, to "be" with purpose is my self-improvement goal. This may not make much sense to those of you who do not know me but I often do things for no good reason (or at least I used to). I liked to say that I was led by "my spirit" but in actuality, I was just being careless. So, I speak less to give myself an opportunity to think, ponder, and consider. There are still times in which even after careful consideration, I draw a blank. These are the moments that I close my eyes and jump! (Metaphorically speaking of course. I can't jump around with my eyes closed all the time because then, people would think I'm crazy.) But it is here in my quiet place that I am able to hear His voice clearly. This comfort allows me to blindly take that leap and know there is a perfect landing. So, if you see me "be"-ing quietly, don't mind me. I'm just waiting for a word from God.
I live in my head and that's not such a bad place to be. It's much better than this so-called reality. Sometimes. Best left alone but sometimes desire company-- just that of one though. Don't need two because I have my own. Many talents and the choice to bury or use. Brain child, Miss Write, and a jack of all trades. I'm not too sure they get it but I certainly don't care. I've got to get this out. I must put it out there. My friends say I'm crazy (my top ain't screwed on too tight) but I haven't been committed yet, so...I write.